The Mucinex Diet
Today at the health club where Hz works…
DOUG: Hillz, you want some Wheat Thins?
HZ: Oh my god, yes. All I’ve eaten today is diet pills.
DOUG: [laughs] That’s so awesome.
HZ: Yeah, it’s funny ’cause it’s true! Did I ever tell you about when I was taking Mucinex and I lost tons of weight?
DOUG: That’s weird. Really?
HZ: Yeah. I would have kept taking it, too, because I was looking really great. But it makes you cough up phlegm all the time.
DOUG: That wasn’t phlegm. It was fat.

Mucinex makes you sexy.
Doug replied:
That Doug guy is Hilarious.
July 13, 2009 at 12:23 pm. Permalink.
Kathryn replied:
I vaguely remember giving you your first Mucinex- I believe it was expired, but you were so desperate to be relieved from your dry cough prison that you took it anyway. So, does that make me your weight-loss guru? I should take some of that, because you should see my ass lately.
July 17, 2009 at 11:19 am. Permalink.
ilovehotdogs replied:
Yes, it was you, Kathryn,
Thank you for introducing me to the most charming eating disorder ever!
Love,
Hz
July 17, 2009 at 7:23 pm. Permalink.